The "Happiest Place on Earth"
An observation in the follies of American parenting. Let's face it, we have no idea what we are doing when it comes to bringing up baby. And it seems the more confident we are, the more we are blundering it.
I know I'm blundering it. I KNOW I'm fucking up my children. And the more experts I consult, the more confused I am. I think my new approach is going to be akin to John Gottman's speech on a good marriage, he's researched marriage for 25 years at the University of Washington and he can't tell you what makes a good marriage, but he can tell you what will ruin one. In 5 seconds in some cases.
I can't tell you what good parenting is, but I can tell you, with fair confidence what will be the demise of your child. And the "happiest place on earth" is a fantastic observation field. It's prime with thousands of kids and parents everyday in an environment that should be ripe with happy people. They are on vacation, in an amusement park directed specifically at kids. And it's one melt down after another. The only difference between the kids and the parents? The melt down point. Most parents last minutely longer than their children before they have the melt down. This is the moment when they use their age and size over their children to exact what they believe is the best behavior, and the goal always has something to do with what the parents wants and needs. It is, after all, all about the parent.
We are a selfish lot. And for all the research and REAL science into the world of human development we cling, pitifully, to the junk and pseudoscience of raising kids. I know what works for myself, being that I'm human, in any given situation and that is, empathy and respect. And being that my child is a small, immature,developing human, it would logically seem that my job as the more mature of our little party, would be to try and convey empathy and respect for my child's feelings at all times.
Let's be real, I fail miserably at this concept, but I try. And so far, as well as pissing off most everyone around me (they are all still convinced that we are dogs and the world of "child training" involves meat and bell) with my parenting practices, we seem to be turning out some okay Offspring. Not perfect but, bearable. I have actual, peer reviewed research to back me up too. (On the practice, not the kids)
I know I'm blundering it. I KNOW I'm fucking up my children. And the more experts I consult, the more confused I am. I think my new approach is going to be akin to John Gottman's speech on a good marriage, he's researched marriage for 25 years at the University of Washington and he can't tell you what makes a good marriage, but he can tell you what will ruin one. In 5 seconds in some cases.
I can't tell you what good parenting is, but I can tell you, with fair confidence what will be the demise of your child. And the "happiest place on earth" is a fantastic observation field. It's prime with thousands of kids and parents everyday in an environment that should be ripe with happy people. They are on vacation, in an amusement park directed specifically at kids. And it's one melt down after another. The only difference between the kids and the parents? The melt down point. Most parents last minutely longer than their children before they have the melt down. This is the moment when they use their age and size over their children to exact what they believe is the best behavior, and the goal always has something to do with what the parents wants and needs. It is, after all, all about the parent.
We are a selfish lot. And for all the research and REAL science into the world of human development we cling, pitifully, to the junk and pseudoscience of raising kids. I know what works for myself, being that I'm human, in any given situation and that is, empathy and respect. And being that my child is a small, immature,developing human, it would logically seem that my job as the more mature of our little party, would be to try and convey empathy and respect for my child's feelings at all times.
Let's be real, I fail miserably at this concept, but I try. And so far, as well as pissing off most everyone around me (they are all still convinced that we are dogs and the world of "child training" involves meat and bell) with my parenting practices, we seem to be turning out some okay Offspring. Not perfect but, bearable. I have actual, peer reviewed research to back me up too. (On the practice, not the kids)
posted by Molly Sue at
8:25 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home