Assertive, Not Bitchy
We teach our children to be polite, compliant individuals. And then we are shocked when they grow up without an opinion. Without a spine!! Or, that they may grow up decidedly to the contrary.
I have, in recent years, encouraged my very high maintenance, vocal, niece that we should strive to be assertive, not bitchy. Ha ha, funny. But, I'm serious. I think all of us, especially girls in this society, should buck society and the system. Assertive, not bitchy. You know, well behaved women rarely make history. I was recently delighted to hear a case of assertive behavior that evoked a standing cheer of ovation from me. I say, "Annie, get your guns!"
Annie is the 14 year old daughter of a dear friend of mine, who is an intelligent, gifted, opinionated, vocal young lady that recently has put her parents into fits of frustrations because, surprise, surprise, they don't see eye to eye. (Shocking isn't it? A teenager who butts heads with her parents?) She has, of late, been enrolled in three different educational options. First, they tried home schooling, then a charter school and finally a local public school. So the latter may not have been the best of options, but hey, when it comes to our children, we sometimes will do desperate things in order to provide them happiness in the world. I know from experience that this particular couple truly wants nothing else for their children but a healthy, happy, productive life. Please, if I had had it as good as this girl when I was her age, Lord knows that I would have found my teenage years far more tolerable. Well, maybe at home, high school was still a bitch!! Fuckin' popular people. But, I digress, as I was attempting to say, perhaps I would have been easier to placate. Hmmm, note to self, 101 things I need to add to my 'parent do' list.
Matt is a friend of Annie's. He tends to be an exuberant and over enthusiastic boy. You know the type. They begin a systematic, unrelenting phase of torturous teasing at about the age of 5, and we delude ourselves into thinking that it's "just a phase". When will we get the message (when they are 30 and still at it) that it's sooo not a phase. Over the course of a day, depending on the day of the month, Matt has a way of pushing all the right buttons, repeatedly, with Annie. Get her the week that "Aunt Flow" is in town for a visit and you are messing with fire! But, we don't expect most Jr. High boys to have gripped any kind of clue when it comes to the female species. Oh, whoops, do they ever? The poking session began in first period. To which Annie attempted to convey to Matt, that she was NOT in the mood. Matt couldn't let it go. If this had been the first incident with this boy, well, perhaps she could have seen fit to 'turn the other cheek'. Or maybe Matt needs to meet his father's palm.
By the time Annie reached second period English with Mrs. Andrews, Annie was making vain attempts to ignore Matt. To exacerbate the situation, our "funny" little friend happen to sit within close proximity to Annie. There is only so much that a human being can take. I know, MisAdventure went to school with jack asses like Matt. It looks cute to start with, it just doesn't end that way. When our little friend, Matt, resorted to calling Annie a "piece of crap", (Come on, couldn't you be a little more creative boy?) Well, Matt had it coming and Matt got it, right across the cheek. Loud enough that it was audible to the teacher. Now, Ms. Molly would have been reduced to tears, but not our sweet Annie. She just let him have it with the inside of her hand! Wahooo! Had I been present, I would have jumped out of my seat and pumped my fist!!
The end of the story, right? Oh no, it gets better. Your thinking that Matt was disciplined for not letting her alone, right? Nope, Annie was dismissed to the principals office. I'm not going to go into the number of bias injustices that were imposed here, but, you can put the pieces together.
Now, I don't endorse violence to solve ones problems and I certainly wouldn't encourage dear Annie to use such tactics on a frequent basis, but, ha ha, you go girl! She was, consequently, suspended and her parents, smartly, removed her from the educational facility.
I say, Annie, get your guns girl! We need more assertive women in this world to stand up to the Matt's of the world. I won't list the butt holes that I should have slapped in my past, both long and recent. Hang in there girl, we'll get you through college yet. And you won't have to deal with the Matt's of the world, your grades will intimidate the hell out of them. Smart women always do...intimidate men. At least, the ones that aren't worth the time of day.
I have, in recent years, encouraged my very high maintenance, vocal, niece that we should strive to be assertive, not bitchy. Ha ha, funny. But, I'm serious. I think all of us, especially girls in this society, should buck society and the system. Assertive, not bitchy. You know, well behaved women rarely make history. I was recently delighted to hear a case of assertive behavior that evoked a standing cheer of ovation from me. I say, "Annie, get your guns!"
Annie is the 14 year old daughter of a dear friend of mine, who is an intelligent, gifted, opinionated, vocal young lady that recently has put her parents into fits of frustrations because, surprise, surprise, they don't see eye to eye. (Shocking isn't it? A teenager who butts heads with her parents?) She has, of late, been enrolled in three different educational options. First, they tried home schooling, then a charter school and finally a local public school. So the latter may not have been the best of options, but hey, when it comes to our children, we sometimes will do desperate things in order to provide them happiness in the world. I know from experience that this particular couple truly wants nothing else for their children but a healthy, happy, productive life. Please, if I had had it as good as this girl when I was her age, Lord knows that I would have found my teenage years far more tolerable. Well, maybe at home, high school was still a bitch!! Fuckin' popular people. But, I digress, as I was attempting to say, perhaps I would have been easier to placate. Hmmm, note to self, 101 things I need to add to my 'parent do' list.
Matt is a friend of Annie's. He tends to be an exuberant and over enthusiastic boy. You know the type. They begin a systematic, unrelenting phase of torturous teasing at about the age of 5, and we delude ourselves into thinking that it's "just a phase". When will we get the message (when they are 30 and still at it) that it's sooo not a phase. Over the course of a day, depending on the day of the month, Matt has a way of pushing all the right buttons, repeatedly, with Annie. Get her the week that "Aunt Flow" is in town for a visit and you are messing with fire! But, we don't expect most Jr. High boys to have gripped any kind of clue when it comes to the female species. Oh, whoops, do they ever? The poking session began in first period. To which Annie attempted to convey to Matt, that she was NOT in the mood. Matt couldn't let it go. If this had been the first incident with this boy, well, perhaps she could have seen fit to 'turn the other cheek'. Or maybe Matt needs to meet his father's palm.
By the time Annie reached second period English with Mrs. Andrews, Annie was making vain attempts to ignore Matt. To exacerbate the situation, our "funny" little friend happen to sit within close proximity to Annie. There is only so much that a human being can take. I know, MisAdventure went to school with jack asses like Matt. It looks cute to start with, it just doesn't end that way. When our little friend, Matt, resorted to calling Annie a "piece of crap", (Come on, couldn't you be a little more creative boy?) Well, Matt had it coming and Matt got it, right across the cheek. Loud enough that it was audible to the teacher. Now, Ms. Molly would have been reduced to tears, but not our sweet Annie. She just let him have it with the inside of her hand! Wahooo! Had I been present, I would have jumped out of my seat and pumped my fist!!
The end of the story, right? Oh no, it gets better. Your thinking that Matt was disciplined for not letting her alone, right? Nope, Annie was dismissed to the principals office. I'm not going to go into the number of bias injustices that were imposed here, but, you can put the pieces together.
Now, I don't endorse violence to solve ones problems and I certainly wouldn't encourage dear Annie to use such tactics on a frequent basis, but, ha ha, you go girl! She was, consequently, suspended and her parents, smartly, removed her from the educational facility.
I say, Annie, get your guns girl! We need more assertive women in this world to stand up to the Matt's of the world. I won't list the butt holes that I should have slapped in my past, both long and recent. Hang in there girl, we'll get you through college yet. And you won't have to deal with the Matt's of the world, your grades will intimidate the hell out of them. Smart women always do...intimidate men. At least, the ones that aren't worth the time of day.
posted by Molly Sue at
10:47 AM
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