Deliberate Ignorance
Your first thought is that, being the obssesed home educator that I am, this is about education. Well, it's not. It's my articulated observance of strange human behavior.
We are given to this world at birth, and if we are fortunate we are continually surrounded by people who love us unconditionally. I say fortunate because in recent months I have witnessed the ability of the human species to be so subtley and yet so devestatingly cruel to the creatures that it is supposed to love the most.
Our society is bound up by rules. It is, in many respects what keeps us in a civilized state. We have a prescribed set of conduct code. How to treat each other and consequences for breaking the code. But we also have this strange arbitrary list of dos and don'ts most decidely set forth by the religious community. And when in violation of this particular code of conduct we exact strange retribution on our loved ones that can and is just what the title above says, a deliberate ignoring of the offender.
Take your pick of offenses. All of which is not illegal, but by and large deemed unethical and at the very least, disrespectful. In this particular case I am referring to infidelity.
We are creatures driven to pair off and told to be monogomous in such pairings. And when, for whatever psychological reasons, we break the social code, we metaphorically crucify the offender. When guilty of such offenses we can debate endlessly what drives an individual to such acts, but this isn't what I am watching. It's the offenders automatic assumption that they have commited a heinous sin and therefore, unlovable.
Some cheaters deserve the social outcasting that is bestowed upon them. By and large they are self-centered ass-hats that can't see beyond the end of their noses. In the context of which I speak, most would fit this bill. We have had a strange cluster of aquaintences recently admit to infidelity. But one case in particular was, without question a true moment of plain stupidity. And in an effort of martyrdom this indivdual has decided that, for whatever reason, they are no longer worthy, perhaps, of our love and forgivness. They are deliberatly ignoring us.
The difficulty is, that with the infidelity, while we long to love this person and accept them. We long to hold them and help them through a painful mistake, they deliberatley ignore us and it makes the it worse. Why, in an hour of need would one choose to assume that they just need to exact punishment on themselves? Is it just part of the lack of foresight and respect for loved ones? Or an inability to see that, regardless of the mistake, they are still loved.
I don't get. And my heart hurts. I wasn't even the cheated on. But I feel abandoned with the loved one. Lost in a state of confusion.
What are we doing to ourselves?
We are given to this world at birth, and if we are fortunate we are continually surrounded by people who love us unconditionally. I say fortunate because in recent months I have witnessed the ability of the human species to be so subtley and yet so devestatingly cruel to the creatures that it is supposed to love the most.
Our society is bound up by rules. It is, in many respects what keeps us in a civilized state. We have a prescribed set of conduct code. How to treat each other and consequences for breaking the code. But we also have this strange arbitrary list of dos and don'ts most decidely set forth by the religious community. And when in violation of this particular code of conduct we exact strange retribution on our loved ones that can and is just what the title above says, a deliberate ignoring of the offender.
Take your pick of offenses. All of which is not illegal, but by and large deemed unethical and at the very least, disrespectful. In this particular case I am referring to infidelity.
We are creatures driven to pair off and told to be monogomous in such pairings. And when, for whatever psychological reasons, we break the social code, we metaphorically crucify the offender. When guilty of such offenses we can debate endlessly what drives an individual to such acts, but this isn't what I am watching. It's the offenders automatic assumption that they have commited a heinous sin and therefore, unlovable.
Some cheaters deserve the social outcasting that is bestowed upon them. By and large they are self-centered ass-hats that can't see beyond the end of their noses. In the context of which I speak, most would fit this bill. We have had a strange cluster of aquaintences recently admit to infidelity. But one case in particular was, without question a true moment of plain stupidity. And in an effort of martyrdom this indivdual has decided that, for whatever reason, they are no longer worthy, perhaps, of our love and forgivness. They are deliberatly ignoring us.
The difficulty is, that with the infidelity, while we long to love this person and accept them. We long to hold them and help them through a painful mistake, they deliberatley ignore us and it makes the it worse. Why, in an hour of need would one choose to assume that they just need to exact punishment on themselves? Is it just part of the lack of foresight and respect for loved ones? Or an inability to see that, regardless of the mistake, they are still loved.
I don't get. And my heart hurts. I wasn't even the cheated on. But I feel abandoned with the loved one. Lost in a state of confusion.
What are we doing to ourselves?
posted by Molly Sue at
9:32 PM
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