The Twilight Zone
It's 3:27 a.m. I've patiently lay motionless for almost two hours hoping that sleep would occupy my thoughts rather than the incessant play of activity from my day life. When boredom finally overtakes my patience I creep to my sofa and curl up with my TiVo remote.
This is where anxiety takes me. To realms of pervasive insomnia. I would like to say I control my mind and its recesses, but that is not the case. And now, of my own tired volition I find myself scrolling through the guide for something to capture my attention. It's entertainment, so, entertain me damn it. Alas, my choices are limited to
Paid Programming
Paid Programming
Gunthy-Renker
Dead Famous: Ghostly Encounters
Rock Hard in 90 days
Paid Programming
I gather, based on my limited options, that the 3 o'clock crowd is not comprised of a highly educated sort. We would appear to be a collection of tired-less shopping, excercised obsessed, spirit chasers. This is what I'm reduced to, an artful way to describe (and appeal to) trailor trash. Although, 'Rock Hard in 90 days' does leave scope for the imagination. Yeah, I don't have that kind motivation. I think I lost what could have been rock hard, if I ever possesed it in the first place, some years ago. (This is what I comtemplate with a wiley bob of my head, lips twisted in a rye smirk.)
I feel that my best option is "Dead Famous: Ghostly Encounters". A show hosted by a well pressed homosexual with a fabulous faux hoc and bad roots. He is accompanied by what appears, literally, to be the human equivalent of a cupie doll. She is mostly bald, with a strange blond whisp of hair positioned a top her head...when that head isn't adorned with a garish and unfortunate scarf.
A camera follows the pair through "haunted" places as they snap pictures and scan the air with magnegtic imaging readers and such. It all seems very scientific. But, I am a skeptic. I would like to believe in ghosts. I WANT to believe in ghosts. It might provide me some definitive "proof", as it were, that we GO somewhere when this earthly body gives out. And, if you know me in real life, you know, one of my greatest fears...is death. Especially and untimely death. If I leave early who would love my children? All of them. I can't leave without reconciling all that I've done, or not done. Ultimately, I WANT to go somewhere.
Where do we go? What is there when, if, we arrive? Who will be there? Will there be a "there"? Is there a God? Is there? What if all those atheists are right? No one can tell me. I've tried. My answer hangs somewhere between assuredy and absurdity. And of course there is the pitiful response. Pity! Because I am pitiful for asking the question. As if I am pitiful for begging someone to find understanding with me. Maybe I just shouldn't ask....
Well, until then, which I pray won't be for a long while, I'll entertain myself with "paranormal investigatore". If nothing eles those "paranormal investigators" have a lot of pictures with light reflective dust particle...particles, hmmmm. That reminds me..........................
This is where anxiety takes me. To realms of pervasive insomnia. I would like to say I control my mind and its recesses, but that is not the case. And now, of my own tired volition I find myself scrolling through the guide for something to capture my attention. It's entertainment, so, entertain me damn it. Alas, my choices are limited to
Paid Programming
Paid Programming
Gunthy-Renker
Dead Famous: Ghostly Encounters
Rock Hard in 90 days
Paid Programming
I gather, based on my limited options, that the 3 o'clock crowd is not comprised of a highly educated sort. We would appear to be a collection of tired-less shopping, excercised obsessed, spirit chasers. This is what I'm reduced to, an artful way to describe (and appeal to) trailor trash. Although, 'Rock Hard in 90 days' does leave scope for the imagination. Yeah, I don't have that kind motivation. I think I lost what could have been rock hard, if I ever possesed it in the first place, some years ago. (This is what I comtemplate with a wiley bob of my head, lips twisted in a rye smirk.)
I feel that my best option is "Dead Famous: Ghostly Encounters". A show hosted by a well pressed homosexual with a fabulous faux hoc and bad roots. He is accompanied by what appears, literally, to be the human equivalent of a cupie doll. She is mostly bald, with a strange blond whisp of hair positioned a top her head...when that head isn't adorned with a garish and unfortunate scarf.
A camera follows the pair through "haunted" places as they snap pictures and scan the air with magnegtic imaging readers and such. It all seems very scientific. But, I am a skeptic. I would like to believe in ghosts. I WANT to believe in ghosts. It might provide me some definitive "proof", as it were, that we GO somewhere when this earthly body gives out. And, if you know me in real life, you know, one of my greatest fears...is death. Especially and untimely death. If I leave early who would love my children? All of them. I can't leave without reconciling all that I've done, or not done. Ultimately, I WANT to go somewhere.
Where do we go? What is there when, if, we arrive? Who will be there? Will there be a "there"? Is there a God? Is there? What if all those atheists are right? No one can tell me. I've tried. My answer hangs somewhere between assuredy and absurdity. And of course there is the pitiful response. Pity! Because I am pitiful for asking the question. As if I am pitiful for begging someone to find understanding with me. Maybe I just shouldn't ask....
Well, until then, which I pray won't be for a long while, I'll entertain myself with "paranormal investigatore". If nothing eles those "paranormal investigators" have a lot of pictures with light reflective dust particle...particles, hmmmm. That reminds me..........................
posted by Molly Sue at
4:15 AM
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