I'm Tired of Being the Grown-up

I'm not sure which I am more tired of, people who can't grow up, or people who have to clean up after those that can't be grow-ups.

I'm pissy and ornery sometimes. I make mistakes and recently I can't seem to keep from sticking my damn foot in my mouth. I'm not sure if I'm surrounded by the oversensitive or if I'm a complete buffoon. I tend to think I'm a buffoon.

But, I'm having to clean up the shit of others that should be more grown-up. It makes me wonder why the Fuck I get involved. I'm under some delusion that I'm making a difference. That's a damn crock.

I've learned in the last week that it really boils down to one thing, people don't give a shit, people want others to butt the fuck out and I take to fucking long to learn a lesson. People don't want others to get involved. They don't want help and they don't want empathy and they sure as fuck don't want a listening ear. They want you do it for cheap and give them the credit or just step aside. I think it's a gender thing. Boys can do it, girls can't. Or maybe it's a Mormon thing, Mormons have cornered the market on Zion, the rest of us need to get on the bus or MOVE. It could be an old thing...I'm old now, so I need to let hipper more up to date people take the wheel.

I ran away to Idaho to pretend that I didn't have a life in Utah. My life came looking for me. Not to mention that some of that life came with me and in an inebriated state, told me off. They say that alcohol is the ultimate truth sirum. Who knows, maybe I had it coming.

So, I get to clean up the shit at the Wave. I know, now, that I should trust no one, with ANY information about ANYTHING. And...I'm lost in world with no sense of humor. I just can't seem to keep from humiliating myself. I found my funny bone, but it's only funny in my little bubble of the world. I'm going back to my sheltered bubble.