You're OK, Just Do It My Way- Part II

(The second part of my long soap box) When people participated in civil rights movements in the 60's, in participating at that time, they may not have changed anything, except themselves. There were no guarantees, but, they did something that most of them had never done, stood up for themselves. That act alone, takes tremendous courage. Courage to put ones safety on the line. Courage to be both inwardly/intellectually honest and outwardly honest.

What I just described for you were people. People, not objects. People with lives, dreams and passions. People who took it upon themselves to speak for what they believed. The way they went about informing the world of what they believed may have changed absolutely nothing, except one thing, their sense of self. The acquisition of personal power. The knowing that they could make themselves heard, within.

What I read in the lines of today's editorial is this; "Be yourself. Be a good citizen. Be gay, I support that. As long as you do it....MY WAY." Society at large is becoming a more accepting beast. And we all can applaud that. Yet I hear the proverbial "but", over and over. From the LDS church who says "Be Gay, but do it our way" to the openly gay man who says "Be gay, but be (look) respectable". Yes, "look" right, according to social definitions.

Look, I'm not comfortable with a fairy in a pink thong any more than you are. (Ok, well, maybe that's your secret fantasy, but, we'll just leave that to the twisted recesses of your mind) but I support the individual to be that fairy, as long as he/she is not encroaching on my person or my property. I'm not comfortable with a southern white man in a white hood, but, I support his right to express himself as long as he does not encroach on my person or my property. In both cases what we are observing, is an external expresion of an internal attitude. And we can't dictate what someone thinks.

Last night, amongst the running and chaos, I escaped, for two minutes, into the bathroom to relieve myself. The room was quiet. The air didn't move, so obviously, I was alone. Or....not so much. The toilet in the stall adjacent to me flushed. And as I exited the stall and turned the corner I about lost my lack of lunch to find my little G.Q. standing at the sink. She scared the shit out me. I didn't realize anyone was IN the bathroom. But, I realized, with a sinking horror, that she had a sudden, paralyzing fear when I entered the bathroom, "What if..." What if, I questioned her presence. What if, I didn't recognize her gender and I complained to Library staff. Or worse, what if I inflicted personal injury on her. She felt compelled to hide her very presence, her existence, for fear of her safety due to my possible objections.

My heart fell into my stomach. Why, why would someone have anything less than respect for her in a public restroom? I wasn't upset by her presence anymore than I was upset a few hours later by the drag queen who was fussing at the mirror in the same bathroom. He is obviously a gay man in a dress. Did this deter me from using the toilet? NO, he's not watching over the stall or under the door!! But, we are offended when individuals such as these don't play by our rules. Which continually brings me back to the same spot, that of Higher Law or Fundamental Law,

1)Do all that you have agreed to do and 2) Do nothing that would encroach on any person or their property.

By using a public restroom we agree to 1)Appear, to a reasonable degree, to be the right "gender" 2)Be respectful to the facility and all persons within it. But seriously, if you follow number two, what's the true importance of number one? Other than your attitude and the imagination that it invokes?

Hmmm, "You're ok, just do it my way". I think, we need to think. Now, I need to get off my soap box, my feet hurt.