What's Wrong With This Picture?

The hair fell in long tresses down his back....It puts Farrah to shame, that's for sure.

I'm A Mormon

Pull your jaw up off the floor. It's one label amongst a dozen that describe me. Although, labels present compli-cations for me. On so many levels. We can't seem to sum ourselves up without labels, although it is entirely appropriate and possible. Yet, when using labels, we over generalize, categorize, compartmentalize, identify, rank, pigeonhole, standardize, systematize and stereotype ourselves and others based on the names and labels we assign to each other and ourselves. But while I have problems with labels, I have a particular problem with...Mormon. And many of the assumptions, titles and sub-categories within Mormonism.

I grew up within the religion that we all label Mormonism. I am a fifth generation Mormon. I grew up proud of my religion. I am of "royal" lineage within the genealogical lines of Mormonism. Yeah, that's right, I'm a descendant of the big dogs family. I loved the rituals, ceremonies and customs that made up my religion. I loved Sundays. I loved dressing up. I loved meetings, classes and gatherings. I loved my baptism and confirmation. My subsequent induction into Young Womens. I loved my religion. I had plans for my future as dictated within the confines of my religion. And I couldn't wait to participate in future activities. I was going on a mission for the Mormon church. I was going to married in a Mormon Temple.

Well, life has a funny way of redefining track plans. Eventually, I left my religion. And I was labeled with many new names that I wasn't fond of. Anti-, Non-, Ex-. But the last time I checked, I am not any of these. If my childhood religion had been Judaism, Catholicism, or Buddhism, would you call me non-? If I was raised as an Episcopal, would you now label me an ex-Episcopal? If I celebrated Hanukkah and Passover as a child, would I now be anti-Jew for relishing a Christmas tree every December? If I grew up Catholic and now attend the Baptist church in town, am I Non-Catholic or am I Baptist? Or, am I a Catholic-Baptist?

Religion is a sticky, tricky thing. But the values, ethics and morals that we are instilled with in our youth require no labels. They are values. They are morals. They are part of what comprises who we are. Religion, on the other hand, labels us. Give me a label and the world has a list of expectations of me when they hear it, some of it not so good. Oh, you're Mormon...(give me a list people) you wear funny underwear, you believe in secret ceremonies, you have weird prophets, you....fill in the blank. You get my point.

Well I grew up in the Mormon church. And I no longer attend the Mormon church. That can put me in difficult situations with people, being that I love my religion. So I like to talk about it. I like to analyze it. I like to dissect it. But, if you are a current, card carrying member, you don't want to discuss it with me because if I have counter ideas or thoughts, I am? Anti-. And if you no longer participate and you have shredded your card, (which apparently is bar-coded now, go figure) then discussion tends to lean to the sensationalized. How to "witness" to Mormons, or how to "prove" them wrong. Or you don't want to talk about it at all.

I'm a Mormon. A Unitarian Universalist Mormon. Yes, I am. Care to discuss religion? I would. Now, is anyone familiar with the song? Janeen Brady...come on people, where have you lived all your lives!?

What's Wrong With This Picture?

As you crest the hill coming south out of Pocatello, Idaho, if you wait for it...this
is what you see! Laugh! It's Funny...Damn Funny!

Sunrise

I'll tell you how the sun rose,
A ribbon at a time.


The steeples swam in amethyst,
The news like squirrels ran.


The hills untied their bonnets,
The bobolinks begun.


Then I said softly to myself,
"That must have been the sun!"

Funny UnderBritches Aside

Mormon missionaries bare it all! Their under britches aside, obviously! We can see their, uh..heh, heh, bare chest! Scandalous! Money Quote:

Mormons Exposed is a new brand launching a forward-thinking product - a steamy 2008 calendar featuring twelve handsome former Mormon missionaries who have dared to pose bare-chested in the first-ever Men on a Mission calendar. Usually seen riding their bicycles and preaching door-to-door, the calendar celebrates these missionaries' great looks and beautiful bodies, as well as the amazing stories of service of these deeply spiritual men.

Uh, cough, I've only one comment. Tongue firmly in cheek....Nice!!

It's For the Kids

I couldn't have said it better myself! My favorite blog site has an on going discussion on the positives of Gay marriage. I wish he'd come write for me...oh well, I'll just steal it from him.

Some data from Canada on why same-sex couples get married:

According to the census, nearly one in four lesbian married couples in B.C. (24 per cent) have a child living with them, compared with just 13 per cent of lesbian couples living common-law.

Gay men are far less likely to have children than lesbians.

But they, too, have a big marriage gap, with 6.8 per cent of gay married men living with kids, compared with just 0.5 per cent of unmarried gay couples.

How does this undermine civil marriage for heterosexuals? How does it harm society? Isn't it better for children of gay couples to have the legal and social security of a marriage? Isn't legitimacy better than illegitimacy? And doesn't this pattern actually enhance the conservative argument that marriage is primarily for the benefit of children? I guess that argument doesn't count for much with some when lesbians make it.

Would you like to read more? You should. His blog is littered with good conversation on the subject.

Not to mention...He is gay and just got married himself. Good Form!!

Wrath of God

MisAdventure has always had concerns about entering certain places......And certain opinions!

I Have Issues

The main entrance to this "Luxury Golf Course" is right past my favorite local pub!


I'm not fond the current governor in the state of Utah. I affectionately call he and his wife Barbie and Ken. Because, that is exactly what the look like. Barbie and Ken, including the plastic sheen.

But I have serious issues with the man's father, John! He's putting a crimp in my beloved vacation spot. A 18 hole golf course and 500 homes in a town of 1000? Grrrr!

Roe, Roe, Roe Your Boat

Let me preface this by saying that, I do not think, in anyway shape or form, that this is, was or ever should be a political issue.

Roe v. Wade. Looking to go fishing? There's a good can of worms to open, heh? Would it surprise anyone out there that I am, unequivocally pro-CHOICE. I believe in choices. Most of us are blessed with the ability to make them. Many of us choose wisely, some of us, are perpetual bone heads.

I can't account for bone heads. If you make decisions, now or later, that ultimately affect you ENTIRE life, that, my friend, is your CHOICE. Being that the decision has no negative impact on me, well, you can go right ahead and make that choice.

When it comes to "roe"-ing your boat, well, having children impacts many of us in ways that we never imagined. I wouldn't trade mine for all the world. I would step in front of a train for them. In most cases the influence that they have is positive. Even on those days when you want to throttle the little bastards.

Some of the impacts we take are unexpected and difficult. Children with handicaps, mental delays, or health problems. Mothers whose bodies do not fair well in process and aftermath of carrying a child. Bodies that are never the same, weight that never goes away, hormone levels that never balance out and a mental state that may never be the same. Being pregnant reeks havoc on the female body. It takes a minimum of two years to recover from a pregnancy. It takes 18-20 for offspring to grow-up! It is...the miracle of life.

If you have a child that I ultimately have to pay for, I might be a little resentful. If you choose to terminate that pregnancy, by choice, then I would support that. I would support you not getting pregnant in the first place, more than anything.

We also can't ask a woman after she has given birth, to asses whether or not she is glad she went through with the pregnancy. You can't put a child, a physical, tangible human into someones arms, and then ask them if they would kill the being. That's unfair and ignorant. Ask me if I think that my niece shouldn't be around? Duh, she's eight, beautiful, vibrant, adorable. Yes, of course I'm glad my sister had her.

If you choose to terminate at a point in your pregnancy in which that purported life inside you could not sustain itself outside your womb, then it isn't life, by my personal definition. But, again, that's personal and generally tied to your religious prescription. And being that it depends on your religious views, that seems to fall into a church vs. state to me.

That being said, hold onto your hats, I'm not a big fan of Roe v. Wade. Granting the rights to an abortion, yes. But I've got issues with it on a federal level. I have the same issues when it comes to the feds amending the constitution to define marriage, too. This does not mean that I would support a complete overturn, but I think that it should be re-written. Confused? Give it time, you'll get over it.

Oy, I Am A Bitch

My husband, the smart ass that he is, informed me at dinner this evening, in his semi-inebriated state, that this beer was brewed with me in mind!

Coming To America

We have a problem in this country. And like all issues we tackle politically, I wonder who of those monkeys on Capital Hill really understands the scope and cost of what we are dealing with. They all want to fluff their feathers and puff their chests, but when putting together the nuts and bolts, like everything else, they are good at bolstering and lousy at solutions.

The U.S. government estimates approximately 10 million people illegally enter this country every year. And they are costing us tax dollars. So, logic would tell us to keep them out, or deport them, right? Well, hold on there cowboy, that might not work either.

When looking at the real issues we have in terms of illegal immigration I'm beginning to wonder if this may be red herring. Not to mention no one wants to be left out. We all want to think that illegal immigrants hurt our communities. Well, we all can't be Los Angeles or Miami. While there are ways that this impacts us that many of us fail to address, it isn't as profound as the media would lead us to believe.

We forget, too, that when we make sweeping changes, those changes look good on paper. But it cost money, time and effort. Just like out sourcing impacts your wallet, in a positive way, so illegal immigrants may not be costing you, locally, what you think. Unless, you live in L.A. With Latinos comprising 35% of the population in the greater Los Angeles area, there has to some serious financial impact to those that live in California. But in my neck of the woods? It only impacts those I love when the INS decides the "crack down" on undocumented workers. So far, in five years, it has impacted my Mother and now a good friend of mine from Kenya, living here legally. Or so they thought.

This is America, and we've been taking immigrants since the beginning. It's what makes us the country we are. We should encourage those who come here to do it legally. We should make efforts to encourage undocumented workers to change their status. Grant them amnesty? Well, that's more than I have the patience for right now. Unless you want to grant me amnesty the next time I do something I know is illegal. If my motives are altruistic, then why not?

So before you go jumping on the wagon with the most supporters, make sure you read all the side boards. Because reading only the one from the back, sometimes makes you out of balance.

When In Rome

Peter is on his way to Italy! Can I say how excited I am for him? One of my kids gets to see the world. And as they say, "When in Rome...." I expect such stories. I am....soooooo jealous.

I'm curious in his world travels if his ability to blend in, in Rome, will make the travel companions wonder.....Kidding, I'm kidding. He'd have to be in Greece for that. Right?

Just promise me that you will absolutely run and tackle that Missionary you are going to pick up!! You haven't seen him in two years! Airport tackle is indeed a must. Screw decorum and rules....Hug the boy!! Smother him, in fact!

For Good

If you have seen "Wicked" or have the sound track then you know the song of which I refer in the title, "For Good".

When I jetted off to L.A. to see the musical I had never even heard of it or the book. I came out of theatre, HOOKED! For so many reasons!! One of which was the strange parallels I saw in my life to the musical.

The song, "For Good", made me cry. Yes, in the theatre!! I won't tell you who I thought of. They are well aware of who they are. The strangeness of this person in my life is, baffling. Their entrance, age, impact, and wisdom. And a very blessed Mom, ask that we all think of someone who has impacted our lives. Good on ya, girl. I thought of many. But, this song, made me think of this person(s) most especially, right now, in my life.

For Good

I've heard it said,
That people come into out lives
For, a reason
Bringing something we must learn
And we are led
To those who help us most to grow
If we let them
And we help them in return
Well, I don't know if I believe that's true
But I know I'm who I am today
Because I knew you...

You really must hear the rest. Thank you...to those that have impacted me in my life. To you both, I love you!!

Not So Fond Memories

Six years ago today I was teaching. Six years ago today at 8:42 MST I called one of the dearest ladies in my life in New York and frantically inquired where her dear husband was. Had she heard from him? I cried uncontrollably with her. A wonderful man we affectionately refer to as "Papa" at our house, was somewhere in the city. And we didn't know where he was. A commodities trader, he had gone to work like everyone else that morning. She got off the phone, she had to leave all the lines open in case he called.

For four more hours I waited for "Gram" to call and tell that all was well. At 12:33, I heard a weary Papa's voice on the end of line. He was home. Unlike many of his friends and colleagues, he was home. He was going to rest. He had fled as the second plane flew over his head and he watched the impact. He was tired, he said. He wanted to sleep.

I'm glad you came home Papa. We love you!

What's Wrong With This Picture?

So I have a new idea. I sometimes see things in life outside of how the rest of us may view it. Recently I posted a picture of one of my kids, with Sasquatch. So here is the picture of the week. My SIL thinks I should title the post "tomato testes". I wonder if that would go over well with my Mother? Hmm, we won't tell her.

What's Wrong With This Picture?

I think this may be what you call....bassackwards?

Truth Hurts

When dealing with children, one has to have a thick skin. They tend to tell you exactly what they think. And if they have been raised in an environment where they are encouraged to speak their minds, which is the case in my house, then sometimes the words STING!

With a revolving door of kids and teens at my home, I frequently have a room full of opinionated people who speak their minds. I think part of that may be that they are not allowed to do it at home, so they come to my house to do it. Good for them! But, when they are honest, well, it can be harsh. Recently it was put in my face! And with some examination, I discovered that, son of bitch, they were right. Damn, truth hurts.

So I am owning up to my faults and I promise that, I will put some concerted effort into improving my attitude. My "anti" attitude.

Drink And Be Merry

The Alcoholic Beverage Control commission. Whatever genius came up with this idea should be applauded. (Customary roll of the eyes employed) And in this town, stacking it, the ABC, with Evangelical Christians who don't believe in drinking alcohol, that's fuckin brilliant. Not to mention, some of the members, have not so brilliant moments. There are five members on this commission. Four of these bright spots, don't consume alcohol. And in most cases they are going to save the rest of from our consumption.

Please! Alcohol, while being a beverage that I would consider a drug, is a beverage. Something you drink with a meal or on a hot day when you relax. Over consumption is a very bad idea. It tends to impair any activity you may want to participate in and your physical condition in the morning? Not so pleasant. But, with that said, it is a BEVERAGE. And when consumed with responsibility, is one that many of us enjoy!!

Being that so much of the population does not consume the stuff due to, minor oversights, I find it exceedingly frustrating that they are always trying to make the consumption harder. It doesn't make it harder, it makes them more annoying.

In many European countries the legal drinking age is 16! These kids can't have a license until they're 21, but the can intoxicate themselves at 16. While this may seem, mmmmm stupid? When put in perspective may actually a stellar idea.

Let's examine, shall we? In America our transit system, sucks. And to remedy the situation we have found it necessary to license young people to drive when they are 16. Have you ever really processed what it is to give a 16 year old the privilege to drive a VEHICLE. Think about it. You let them operate a 2 ton machine with highly explosive material contained within a hot environment with very little training and you put ALL of us in danger of? Homicide. Death. Murder? Catch up...I'm not done.

At 21, when the driving skills of most of these individuals still lacks, we allow them to legally consume a beverage that can and does seriously impair all physical function. In some cases we have completely FORBIDDEN them to touch alcoholic beverages, let alone taste, try or experiment. Especially when in most supervised experimentation, we tend to learn, not only what does and doesn't work, but, we also take the mystery out of it. It's like knowing how the magician does his illusions. It's no fun to go to the show if you know the secret.

In my humble opinion, we have it backwards. And as you all know, everyone is entitled to MY opinion. Let the little bastards drink when they are 16. They'll get wasted, hurt only themselves, and then when they have learned the appropriate ways to consume the drink, then we license them to drive the homicide machine that puts the rest of us in danger.

In my neck of the woods it is customary for the predominant culture not to consume beverages of such make-up. They don't drink is what I'm telling you. It matters not what their reasons are. I respect the fact that they follow a dogma that prohibits such consumption. But why do I have to defend my right to ingest it. I'm not going to get into religious semantics. It is what it is. Could we just please make the ABC a more logical make-up. And could we please make buying, selling and consumption rules less annoying? Please?

Gospel......

Dogma, article, canon, conviction, credenda, credo, creed, doctrine, gospel, opinion, persuasion, precept, principle, rule, teachings, tenet, view.

Yeah, pick one. They all fall under a belief system. Where I grew up, Gospel, is a complete reference to an institutional system of religion. You can sum up the religion in my city to almost any individual with a single word. Generally, "The Church" or "The Gospel". "The Church" has "the members". You get my point.

I was recently accused of being anti-Church. So, I've been mulling over this "anti" thing. Am I? Am I antiChurch, antiChurch members, or antiGospel Doctrine? Is it productive?

I am surrounded by "The Church". Lord knows I live in it's capital headquarters. And the population in any given region is about 70% members. You can't exactly get around 'it'. And making an exit from said organization without some serious boat rocking, yeah, good luck. Sometimes, there are near drownings. Mine, was a near drowning.

Fifteen years ago I had pretty much had enough. So I called it quits. To the extent that you can in my world. Let's just say it's kind of like overcoming an addiction of sorts while living in the "grow house". Liken it to taking the recovering alcoholic to the bar with you as the designated driver. It's difficult to be in it and not be of it. And not to desire to be of it. It's magnetic.

Yes, I did analogously compare a religion to an addiction. Relax, if you are of the predominate persuasion, don't get your g's in a twist. It's not a personal character flaw. I'm not about dis-respecting you for your beliefs, as long as the respect goes both ways. It's clearly stated in "the rules" (please refer to 5,6,8 & 15.) that if I know you, at some point I will bitch about you. Whether I like you or not.

I don't encourage people to leave the predominant religion in this state. I also do not recommend that they stay. I can not make decisions of such magnitude for other people. I can only hold your hand along whatever path is best for you. Be who you are, be good at it. And let the rest of "be".

So, in an effort to examine my attitude, I recently opened 'Pandora's box'(this was an unintentional provocation...some people!) At my house that's a box with lots of historical books. Approved and dis-approved. I really shouldn't play with fire, if you know what I mean. But let's all agree, that some things, should be left unopened. I put the box back into storage. Two things have been determined, 1) unless provoked, I am not "anti"(careful, provoking can be unintentional. I'm not perfect, I do have my moments of retardation. That's what the rules are for, disclaimer.) and 2)Some storage, should stay, in storage.

Orgaaaaasmic!

Oh, oh, oh oh, ohohoh ooooooohhh! Did I get your attention? Quick clarification, we have a wonderful friend whose special talent is to skank, sexualize, adulterate or otherwise twist, anything and everything. The above title, is one of his favorite words. It is a wonderful word that describes anything wonderful, lovely, exciting, passionate or just plain fun to do! (His other favorites include cheese and rice.)

Well, this old fart discovered something today that she finds, orgaaaasmic! Along with biking, skiing, reading, religion, children, humans, music, wine and good food I figured out the Wave Board, Rip Stick, Street Surfer. Whatever you want to call it, I got my fat ass onto one and actually made the thing work. And it is awesome! It's like the first time you really figure out how to make amazing turns in powder, a good pull over the wake when you're water skiing. It just feels good. And it's fun. Who knows, I may actually gain some skill at it! KKhuh, please....(note of sarcasm) like I said, I got my fat, old ass up on the thing. Let's not get any delusions of grandeur.